Well, It's Official...

You thought I was going to tell you where we are moving to didn't you?  Hahaha!!  That's funny! Sorry to drag that one out a bit - now you know how we feel.  But we are having some forward motion which is progress and all I really care about at this point in time.

So this entry is going to be short, more of just a quick update because I feel we really need to chronicle all that's happening in our crazy lives these days as it's a part of the journey.  And this journey has been wild - maybe not every day - but overall.

As you know, we are in the process of figuring out our next steps in our lives.  We know that it will either be back home in Boston or in Amsterdam.  We felt pretty confident that we weren't going to be staying in Barcelona but yet, we've been hesitant to make it official.  Call it Murphy's Law but we figured that if we made it official that we were leaving Barcelona - as in giving notice to school and to our landlord - before we had anything in writing, that something would happen and we would find that yes, in fact, we are staying here.  Kind of ridiculous but at the same time, our lives haven't exactly been on track these days and it wouldn't have surprised me to have that happen.

But today I heard from school.  I've been pushing them off which is unfair.  Down payment on tuition was due at the end of March - we are now into May.  It hasn't been paid yet.  They've made other parents pay to secure their spots and so I totally get it - we need to shit or get off the pot.  So I talked to Josh - the time has come.  We had to make a decision.  It's time to give our notice.  It's official - we are leaving Barcelona.

I emailed school and then emailed our landlord.  I have heard back from school and our landlord and so far so good.  I cried because I can't believe it's real.  I cried because Barcelona has become my home and while it's not "home home", it means moving on and starting over again.  I cried because I know that when the kids know that it's definite, they are going to be upset that they are leaving what they consider to be their home. Yes, they've known it's coming, but telling them it's likely and telling them it's for sure are two different things.  The other night I mentioned it to Aidan and his response "You are ruining my life.  I grew up here.  I love it here.  And I want to live here for the rest of my life!".  Yeah that was a total 180 from where he was a few years ago.  So when I tell him that it's for sure, it's not going to be pretty. 

And I cried because I was relieved.  Yes, I know, relieved.  Because again, this is some forward motion on what is happening in our lives.  We may not have an official destination yet, but we will be moving somewhere in 8 weeks, that much is for sure.  Yes, the countdown is now down to weeks.  There is no pressure there or anything.  Ha!!  But the fact that decisions have been made is a relief.  We know now that our time here is coming to a close and we need to make sure that we enjoy every last moment of it (and absolutely of the weather because no matter where we go, it's not going to be like here!).  

So small steps.  Small steps add up though and eventually, we'll have a plan.  It has to happen... otherwise I'm shipping my stuff to no where in 8 weeks. 

Besos,

Julie

Feliz Cumpleaños Liam! Liam Turns 7!

I can't believe yet another year has gone by and Liam is now 7!  Not only is my baby not a baby any more, but he's lived well more than half of his life here in Barcelona.  My Spanish Liam :)  It still blows my mind to think of it from that perspective.

Six was a great year for Liam.  He's loved first grade and has so many friends in his class.  He's a social butterfly, always has been.  Yet he doesn't like to be the center of attention (unless he's at home where he pretty much demands it!).  He is incredibly kind to others and has such a big heart.  He's gossipy which makes me laugh - always telling me who is "dating" who at school.  He's smart.  He loves school and learning.  Though he did try to tell me recently that his teacher told him he was only "allowed" to read at bedtime and bedtime only.  Did I mention he's also a bit manipulative?  ;)

I love how much Liam has grown this year.  While he's not a big kid quite yet like his brother, he is certainly getting there.  He embraces being the baby and yet, he's becoming more independent each day.  He's witty.  He loves sarcasm (thank you Big Bang Theory).  He is full of imagination - an imagination that I'm incredibly envious of.  He likes to make people smile and laugh and his laughter is contagious.  He is just a happy kid.

Liam's birthday celebration managed to go all weekend long.  It started off on Wednesday with cupcakes at school.  With a 4 day weekend that included Liam's birthday, it was a great way to kick off the celebrations.  The kids did a really cute song to Liam and then asked him questions and gave him compliments - I think everyone should get something like this on their birthday!!

Mmmmm cupcakes...

The birthday boy!

Liam's class doing a song and dance around him

Liam's classmates asking questions and giving compliments

Eating those yummy cupcakes!

http://youtu.be/oyTz8bKygKU 

Liam's class singing Happy birthday and more!

On his actual birthday we started off the day opening presents.  In an attempt to not have a ridiculously early morning (on a long holiday weekend), we had him put one present in our bed to open first thing in the morning and then we would snuggle til it was time to go downstairs to open the rest.  Surprisingly, Aidan got up before Liam and then woke up his brother.  I guess he was just as excited to see what presents Liam was getting for his big day.

One last sleep as a 6 year old - when he wakes up, he'll be 7!

We finally made our way downstairs for the official opening of presents and Liam was pretty excited at what he got.  Lots and lots of legos!  He was very excited for his new Ninja Turtles and he also got a cool Captain America shield that shoots nerf bullets - that was a very big hit!

Presents waiting to be opened!

Legos!  This one included the Hulk and Captain America - it doesn't get much better than that!

So excited for Ninja Turtles!!

Very serious about his unwrapping here

The Captain America shield

And our tradition is the sibling gets to open something small - Aidan got some Hobbit legos (and Liam will open a gift on Aidan's birthday next weekend).

In the afternoon, Liam was very excited to go see the new Spiderman movie.  Yeah, this is one I wish Josh and I had seen ahead of time.  It was a bit more violent than we had anticipated.  And it required some eye covering and even at one point Aidan insisted on leaving the theater (we went back in a few minutes later).  But Liam still loved it.  There was still more fun to come though - dinner at our favorite Greek restaurant along with some plate smashing!!

So happy after seeing his movie!

A little gangsta???

I'm glad that we went to the earlier movie as we had originally planned to go to a later one and then head off to dinner.  But as it was, we went to dinner for 9pm and didn't finish til 11!!  If we'd done the later movie we probably wouldn't have gotten to dinner til closer to 10!  Yes, it was a late late night for the birthday boy (and for us!).

On our way to dinner

Last week my friend Jodi and I went to dinner at my favorite Greek restaurant Dionisos.  While I had been there for lunch many times, I had never been for dinner.  Apparently on Friday and Saturday nights they do traditional Greek dancing and plate breaking.  When I mentioned this to Liam, he insisted he wanted to go for his birthday.

Now as we live in Barcelona, keep in mind that restaurants don't even open for dinner until 8 or 8:30. Our kids rarely go to dinner here unless it's tapas (open all the time) or something like Hard Rock which is open on more touristy hours.  But rarely do they step inside a restaurant during traditional dinner hours here.  So we knew this was going to be a stretch for them to go to the restaurant for 9PM and to make it to plate breaking at 10.  The only thing we had on our side was that it was still light out when we left for the restaurant (thank you spring time late sunsets!) so it felt earlier than it actually was. Though it didn't take long at the restaurant before Aidan started to melt down and beg to go home to bed.  In the end, he had a good time but both kids were asleep within moments of their heads hitting the pillows later!

Josh and I are regulars at this restaurant and while we don't know the waiters names (nor they ours), they know we are here all the time and they took extra special care to make Liam's birthday wonderful. They played a birthday song when they brought out his ice cream and the boys were the only ones allowed to smash the plates that evening!
 

Liam loves his Greek food!

So we get to break these plates?

A little birthday ice cream

http://youtu.be/EhUNZCcDZAs  Liam' blowing out candle

Waiting, waiting and waiting til they can smash some plates!

http://youtu.be/7zA0ZeybqT8  Greek dancing with some plate smashing on the dancer's head!

http://youtu.be/6ZcHS8YBStE Some more Greek dancing

http://youtu.be/rEvy1HSuUVs  Finally some plate smashing around 1:13 - of course, I just missed him doing it but you can catch some of it and of course, the aftermath of repeated plate piece breaking!

http://youtu.be/FG9OZNYUxoY  Some more plate breaking (though not by the boys)

So Wednesday cupcakes, Friday presents, Spiderman and dinner and then Saturday was the big slumber party!  The fun never ends!  We are so lucky that Liam has a fantastic group of friends.  He had 5 friends come over late afternoon and stayed the night.  They ran and played all afternoon.  We did pizza, cupcakes and then a movie (plus some tv because they still weren't tired at 10!).  I have no idea how they made it as late as they did but it was 11 before they were all in bed.

It's hard to see close up but they've all got super hero costumes or helmets on as they are battling poor Aidan!

Aidan made his own table

The birthday boy (or the back of his head) and his friends

Loving his day with his friends!

http://youtu.be/uD0j2exgYtA  

A quick and silly Happy Birthday from his friends

Opening presents - they know him well.  A Captain America shield (can't hurt to have 2), Captain America helmet and an Angry Bird gun that shoots rubber balls.  Ahhh the joy of boys!

Yes, it is still light out but believe it or not, it was probably 830 at this point!

This morning they started to wake around 6:45 but now that they are getting older, they are becoming more considerate of each other and they actually let each other sleep as they woke.  One up at 6:45, another at 7:15, 7:45, 8 and then 8:45.  Once everyone was up though, you could not keep these kids quiet!!

The last few still asleep this AM

They played great all morning til their parents came to get them around 10:30AM.  They were outside by 9am which I'm sure the neighbors appreciated (though in my defense I hear all the other kids at 10 or 11 at night).  I think overall it was a huge success and Liam had a great time!!

Perhaps in hindsight a late dinner on his birthday and then a slumber party the next night was not such a great idea.  Two very late nights.  But I think he had fun so it was worth it.  As I type this, he was in bed by 7:30 on Sunday night - totally and completely done!!

I still can't believe my baby is 7 - and he's already talking about what it will be like when he turns 8!  I say, enjoy the time - you are only young once!  Feliz cumpleaños my sweet baby Liam!!  I love you to the moon and back and more everyday!!

Besos,
Julie

An Update to Our Lives in Limbo

It's been a long long 7 months.  Nothing I say here is going to come close to expressing the emotions of this last half year.  I've been journaling the experience but quite honestly, it has not been pretty and I can't say that the parties involved would appreciate the public voicing of my opinion and so it will remain in my private archives for the time being.

But we have finally made progress.  It was a long time coming.  An emotional rollercoaster like none that I have ever experienced before and I thought just moving to Spain was rollercoaster enough.

I can't even remember where I formally left off since I've been journaling all along.  So I guess let's back track to the fall and I'll update from there.  

Last summer Josh suggested to me that this year (as in school year) should be our last in Barcelona due to changes in his role here and the lack of work left for him to accomplish.  This would be a year earlier than we had planned.  Our plan was to then repatriate to the US this coming summer.  However, things never quite go as planned as we've learned. 

As Josh was transitioning his role to the local lead here in Barcelona in October, he was approached by higher ups at the company to see if he would be able to take on the interim CTO position for their subsidiary company, Albumprinter, located in Amsterdam while they look for a permanent person to fill this role.  Now you may remember me bringing up Amsterdam a while back (http://www.megustatuzapatos.blogspot.com.es/2013/09/the-time-we-almost-moved-to-amsterdam.html) - yeah, this is the same position he wanted a year ago but fell thru.  The position was expected to last 3- 6 months which in a way would be perfect as we figured it would probably end up being closer to the 6 month mark with the holidays, etc and would put us closer to the time we would be moving back to the US with the worst case scenario that Josh would go home to the US ahead of the kids and I and we would finish up the school year here and then follow.

Within a week (the first week of November) Josh was commuting every single week to Amsterdam.  It took some trial and error as far as when he would fly out and when he would come back home to Barcelona that would work best with all our schedules (the 7AM flight on Mon AM that required him to leave at 4:30AM did not work well!).  In the end, we've agreed that he flies out on Sunday night and returns most weeks (though not all) on Thursday night.  If he doesn't return Thursday night, he comes home on Saturday morning early.  It's a lot of wear and tear on him with all the travel because even though it's only a 2 1/2 hour flight, with the travel to the airport, waiting in the airport and the flight, it ends up being closer to 5 1/2 hrs every single Sunday and Thursday.  

At first it wasn't so bad.  Josh had traveled for work before although no where near to this capacity. But a few days here, a week there, it hadn't been bad.  But after the first week there was a second and a third and then a month.  Depression began to kick in.  It wasn't that this was soooo difficult with the kids.  I'm incredibly fortunate that the kids are older and more self sufficient than if I were here with a baby or toddler with absolutely no support.  

It was that I was lonely.  And not only was I lonely without my partner in crime, I was also stressed. I'm a planner and suddenly (or perhaps not so suddenly as we were in a bit of limbo before this, though closer to a solution) I had absolutely no control over our immediate future or that future, 6, 8 or 12 months ahead of us.  

Josh loves the job.  He has always loved his work at Vistaprint but the last year + had not been so great with all of the re-orgs and unknowns.  I could hear it in his voice how incredibly happy he was in Amsterdam.  It only pissed me off unfortunately.  The poor guy couldn't win.  His hope was that they would ask him to stay on full time and give up the search for an outside hire.  

My original "plan" was that we needed a game plan in place by December 31st, 2013 on where we would be living after the school year finished.  That plan came and went.  I was so far up Josh's ass it was ridiculous.  Pretty much going from highs to lows in a moment - I could have a nice conversation with him and then in an instant, I'd be ballistic that he had no new information.  All of this, of course, was beyond his control and the reasonable part of me knew that, but it didn't matter at that moment.  I'm sure the last 7 months have been super pleasant for him as well with his nut job wife here in BCN that he had to deal with daily.  

By the middle of January we received some great news.  They would like to hire Josh to work in Amsterdam full time.  Josh was elated and I wanted to vomit.  Another move?  And not home?  But at the same time, I was also excited for a new opportunity and for the kids to have more time living abroad - I knew the feeling of nausea would pass.  We then agreed that March 31st would be our new date for a variety of reasons.  

But here's the stickler and this is where we have been ever since.  Because AP is autonomously run, it wasn't as simple as just transferring an employee from one department to another.  And so the last several months we have been waiting to see if this is something that could even be done.  March 31st came and went.  We understood that they were making best efforts to make it happen but also that there is no guarantee that it would come to fruition.  The longer we waited, the more stressed I would become.  And so we have been waiting... and waiting... and waiting.  For four more very long months.

I have cried... a lot.  Like almost every day.  I'd have a good day and then several bad days.  I left the house only when I had to - gym, groceries, kid stuff and that was about it.  I wasn't proactive about getting together with people.  I just didn't care any more.  Normally when Josh used to travel, I'd take the time to have my friends over for dinner - nope, not at all.  I think in the last 7 months I've had 2 dinners here, maybe 3 aside from when I've had friends visiting from out of town.  I just had no desire to be social.  

I can't say this was probably good for the kids.  While I wasn't teary in front of them, nor was I super excited or happy or energetic either.  I was still getting things done because, well, they needed to be done.  But I can't say that they didn't sense my lack of energy or that I was highly emotional - I'm sure they did.

About a month ago, I decided I was done with this shit.  I can't live like this - sad and depressed all the time.  I don't like who I've become.  I don't like where it's going and I'm tired of being so emotional. And so I threw everything to the universe. Tossed up the white flag in defeat and decided what will be will be.  I've felt about 1000 times better since then.  I've no doubt that beautiful spring weather (not that winter here is anything to be sad about) helped in this process as well as having several rounds of friends and family on the docket for visits that will take us thru early June.

Last week Josh asked again when he might expect to see his contract.  He was told it would be this week.  After waiting for 4 months, I can honestly say I wasn't holding my breath.  So no one was more surprised than me when on Monday evening Josh called and said that he had his contract in hand.  It's not ready to be signed, but it's a start.  It's a step towards what will possibly be our future - in Amsterdam.  But nothing is definitive as of yet.  

So now we wait a little bit more but at least we have some forward movement which is more than we've had in quite some time - something that is a huge relief for us both.  We are looking towards the future and while we don't know for sure where we will land, we know it's going to be an adventure either way.

Besos,

Julie

Sant Jordi 2014

While every holiday here is incredibly fun and full of life, there is no holiday in Barcelona that compares to Sant Jordi.  It is by and far my absolute favorite.  For those that might not remember, Sant Jordi is Barcelona's answer to Valentine's Day only bigger and better.

Instead of the traditional Hallmark card, roses and chocolate, it's a bit of a twist here.  Combined with International Book Day, the tradition is that men give women a rose and women give men a book. This can be a friend, a family member or someone you love - it does not matter.  It is all inclusive.

The legend of Sant Jordi is about Saint George (Jordi here in Catalunya) rescuing the princess from the dragon.  So much of what you see during the day is images of Sant Jordi and the Dragon.  When Sant Jordi stabbed the dragon.  In the spot where the dragon's blood spilled, a rose bush grew.  And Sant Jordi plucked a rose to give to the princess.  As you walk down most every street you are confronted with table after table of either roses or books. And as you near the center of the city, these tables become larger and larger and become tents filled with people, authors and books.  Roses everywhere but not just real roses but roses created by artists - jewelry, puppets and more.  You can tell they've had to get creative over the years in order to differentiate from the competition.

My friend Jodi is in town and her timing could not have been better because I have spent the last few months holed up in our apartment during the day.  With beautiful weather on Sant Jordi, it was a perfect day to walk around town to see what was going on.  We walked from my apartment in Gracia down to Placa Catalunya - normally about a 45 minute walk but much longer when you take time to smell the roses (ok that was a really bad pun).  We took our time walking around and checking out all the sights along the way.  Not to mention there were huge crowds of people once we got to Passeig de Gracia - it was hard to walk at much more than a snail's pace at times.  I'm pretty sure all of Spain was in the general Placa Catalunya area which could explain a bit about the economy here since these people were obviously not working!

Sant Jordi cupcakes...unfortunately they did not taste even close to how good they looked.  But they were pretty at least!

Flowers and Catalan flags

Placa de Vila de Gracia - there were book sellers surrounding the clock tower

Take your picture as Sant Jordi and the Dragon

The puppet I bought Liam - the dragon goes in and out of the rose with a stick (the stem of the flower)

Catalunya (Independence flags) flag cookies with roses

A lot of booths we saw had propaganda about freeing Catalunya from Spain...in addition to selling roses and books. This tee shirt says "Make no mistake.  I'm Catalan and so I'm not Spanish"

Catalan independence and standard flag bracelets made from rainbow looms - I told Aidan he's missing a whole market here!

Finally a booth with books in English...too bad they are all tourist books!

Even El Corte Ingles was sporting it's Catalan flag during the celebrations

After we made our way thru Placa Catalunya, I had to make my way up to school for the kids' annual Sant Jordi festival.  Again, this is my favorite of all the performances they put on each year.  It is traditional, it is adorable and it brings a tear to my eye every year as I think of how lucky we have been to have the opportunity for our kids to go to such a wonderful school that does these kinds of things.

And while the Sant Jordi festival is LONG at the boys' school (it was 2 1/2 hours and there is no seating for the parents so you are standing the whole time), it is worth it and so much fun!

Liam loves any reason to celebrate!

Heads of school and the Spanish/Catalan teachers starting the festivities!

Liam's class coming out to do their performance

Liam is the first child on the left in the blue shorts

http://youtu.be/cGr5thCILPQ

Liam's 1st grade class performance

And here comes Aidan's class!

Aidan is at 12 o'clock in the plaid shorts

Now at 5 o'clock...

http://youtu.be/6EgDnXMUJeo

Aidan's 4th grade class performance

There was even a casteller performance from some of the middle schoolers!  This is no easy feat!

No festival is complete without a gegante (giant)!  In our case, it's Benjamin Franklin (the boys' school is the Benjamin Franklin International School)!

As always, the most fun performance and definitely not traditional is that done by the 11th graders. Each year, they do their own interpretation of the legend of Sant Jordi...with a modern twist.  It's a lot of fun to watch and while it would be tempting to grab the kids and go after their performances are done, we'd hate to miss out on this!

http://youtu.be/F3dFXVYEObE

11th grade dance - to the tune of Cotton Eyed Joe

That was it.  It was a fun day had by all and with love in the air, I should also note, that on a rare day that we walked home, Aidan decided to tell me that he has a girl that he likes in his class.  He wanted to know how he could tell her he likes her and if she would be his girlfriend.  OMG where does the time go?  How can my baby be at a stage where he likes girls?  We had an awesome and mature conversation the whole way home from school.  And while I'm sad that mom isn't the love of his life any more, I love this young man he is becoming.  What better day to talk about all different kinds of love than Sant Jordi??

Liam with his rose/dragon puppet that I gave him - it was a HUGE hit!

My baby isn't a baby any more!

Besos,

Julie