Last Week of School

This last week of school has been bittersweet.  For Liam, it's the only school he's ever known.  For Aidan, it's where the majority of his education has taken place.  It feels like home to them.  Wednesday morning, Aidan said to me "I wish school could last another month so I don't have to leave my friends so soon."  I hear you my boy... I hear you.

This is where they have built friendships that will hopefully last a lifetime.  This is their place where they go every day to not just learn but to work hard, play hard and to make great friends.  And they have done just that.  School is so important from a multitude of angles.  But now it's time to say goodbye to our second home of BFIS as we move on to our new school later this summer.

This is the place where our children have grown their wings and learned to fly.  They have had a network of teachers and support that have given them the best opportunities to become the people they are today and to shape the foundation of who they will become tomorrow.  And each and every one of those people will be missed dearly.

But it's not just saying goodbye to our teachers this week, but also to some of our friends.  Friends that have grown up with our children in the last 4 1/2 years.  Who have become their support in their own special way.

On Wednesday, one of Liam's best buds, Logan, was having his last day.  I was at school for a play for Liam and am so glad that I was there because otherwise we might not have had the opportunity to say goodbye and to get one last round of photos with the kids.  Though our hope is that this is not goodbye but see you later and that they will visit us in Amsterdam and vice versa.

Shoma, Logan and Liam after the play (notice Liam's new Netherlands jersey - didn't take him long to change allegiances!)

The 4 musketeers - Shoma, Logan, Liam and Quinn - an awesome awesome group of kids!

One last shot on the playground.  Love these guys and totally going to miss them - I know Liam is especially sad to leave!

The mood in our house this week has been reflective of the impending move.  Aidan claims he's not moody but their is normal Aidan moody (and believe me, that's moody enough) and there is moody. He's sad, he's upset and yet he's excited for the new adventure ahead of us.  He's confused is what it comes down to.  And I get it.  I felt the same way when we came to Barcelona and left our friends in the US behind.  He'll hopefully understand that while he won't see them every day any more, the most important friendships, those really solid foundations, they aren't going to change no matter where he lives.

On Thursday we started to do repairs to our apartment and the leave is becoming more and more obvious.  Walls are being painted, furniture is being moved.  The Super Mario and Ninjago rooms are no more.  In fact, the boys had to sleep in my room Thursday night because all their furniture was in the middle of their rooms and the paint fumes were too much.

We also said goodbye to the turtle on Thursday evening.  Turti was a non-descript kind of pet.  He didn't do much.  The kids didn't play with him.  He was just... there.  But it was another sign of our time coming to a close.  Thankfully he's going to Aidan's best friend's house where he looks like he's going to have a much happier life sharing a tank with two other turtles and a play area that he gets to stretch his little turtle legs on.  It will be for the best but I can understand where he is coming from.  I took pictures but apparently my sd card needed to be reformatted and I've lost them.  Sorry Aidan :(

Liam is finally getting it.  The reality is sinking in as the school year comes to a close.  He's not doing badly but he's not happy either.  He has an amazing crew of friends (though so does Aidan) and it's really the first group of friends that he has had since when he came here at age 2 he wasn't really at the stage in his life where he was forming friendships in the same way he does now.

But Friday, Friday was the test of all tests.  We've said goodbye countless times over the last 4 1/2 years.  Too many to keep track of.  But this time, this time it's us leaving.  The relationships we've formed are true and this school has become our community - the amazing teachers, staff and all the friends that the kids have made.  I remember leaving our house in Attleboro with the tears flowing as we said goodbye to our lives there on our way to embark on the adventure of a lifetime.

Last day of 1st and 4th grade!!

Last day riding on the luxury bus to school (seriously, what a life they have!)

Last bus ride to BFIS!

Liam had his class party today.  I was making cookies first thing this morning - my only opportunity to do so (Liam I sacrificed my morning run for you - hope you enjoyed those cookies!) in order to get to school by 10:30.  Josh was returning the car today at 1 so it was back to the old school way of public transportation to get there.  Good thing too - it was a big day of towing cars at school (there is no parking lot, only street parking).

Anyways, Liam had his class party.  It was a fun morning filled with special "candy" awards for the kids.  Liam got the "exploding with positive attitude" award which came with pop rocks.  Absolutely adorable and totally fitting for my super positive kid.  There are many things that could hold him back but he doesn't let them, he just keeps on going in forward motion with a happy, smiley attitude.  That's my kid!!

Liam getting his award

His "exploding with positive attitude" award

Liam and Quinn ... Liam and Tomas

There was a video that the school made to the song "Happy" and a slide show of pictures that had been taken of the kids in class during the year.  It was nice to chat with some of the parents and watch the kids all having a great time, especially when it came to their yearbooks.  Everyone loves to sign yearbooks!!

Signing yearbooks

Liam and his friend Mateo watching Horton Hears a Who at the end of the school day... they've made themselves rather comfortable!!

We left Liam's class a little more abruptly than I planned and I'm sorry Ms. Kyle for not saying goodbye. The kids were off and running!  And it would have gotten emotional!!

Aidan apparently had his party yesterday.  How I missed the note home about it, is beyond me.  So I didn't see him until the end of the school day.  When I found him in his class (after I went to the wrong floor of the building searching for him - obviously my brain is mush these days), he and his friends were doing the Macarena to Just Dance. It was AWESOME!  I took a few pictures but unfortunately wasn't fast moving enough to grab video.  But the smiles on their faces said it all.  After that, Gangnam Style.  I love these kids... so much!

Aidan, Johnny and Guille doing the Macarena

Aidan, Guille and Johnny

Raul, Marc, Johnny, Aidan and Guille with Natalie in the back

Gangnam Style

We did a few goodbyes in Aidan's classroom.  Some of the kids we will stay in touch with, others likely not.  But it was sad nonetheless.  We did a few goodbyes and see you laters on the patio - I hate to say it, but I rushed out of there and didn't say goodbye to all that I was hoping to talk to - it was just becoming too emotional.  If we didn't say goodbye to you, it's not because we don't love you, it's because we just couldn't bear anymore in one day.

 Aidan and his awesome teacher, Ms. MaryAnn and his learning support teacher Ms. Meritxell... 

Aidan and Johnny

Aidan with Ms. Lefton and with his friend Isa (who was his first friend here in Barcelona).

Liam and Ms. Alex - thanks for sticking with us all these years Alex.  

You know how much it meant to us!

Hanging out on the patio reading yearbooks

Aidan, Pablo and Bruno... Alex and Aidan

But we didn't let the sadness bring us down.  We were off to the park with some good friends for one last big playdate.  Aidan had Max, Guille and Nicolau with him and Liam had Quinn and Miles.  It was a super fun day, exhausting for the kids to say the least, but full of running, playing, squirt gun fights and a casual lunch.  The perfect way to spend the last day of school.

Miles, Liam and Quinn at the park

The big kids - Max, Aidan, Nicolau and Guille

Aidan had to say goodbye to Nicolau today as he and his family are leaving for their summer trip this weekend.  It broke my heart.  He was so quick about it.  And I knew it was because he felt himself get emotional.  I could see it in his face.  And his mood afterwards reflected how difficult it was.  But now that Aidan's bigger the hope is he will use his email and really try to stay in touch with those he cares about and Nicolau is in that exclusive group of friends for Aidan.

Aidan and Nicolau

We dropped off Liam at Quinn's house for the night.  Quinn leaves for his family summer trip tomorrow.  Ahhh ex-pat life - people don't stick around after school gets out.  So tomorrow we will say goodbye again.

It's been a rough week and as we enter our last 10 days in Barcelona, I expect that we will continue to experiences these rollercoaster emotions.  Excitement at what is to come and sadness as to what we are leaving behind.  All I know is that we will embrace these last days with enthusiasm and will do our best to leave here with the happiest of memories knowing that we took full advantage of our time here and met amazing people who have had an everlasting impact on our lives.

Besos,
Julie

Learning About Loss

There are times when I debate whether a moment in our lives here is appropriate to share with the world.  The lines of blogging can be a bit blurred.  Somethings can be just a little too personal and at the same time, these are the moments that mold us into the people we will become - whether good or bad.  And in this journey of ex-pat life, so many events have impacted our lives.  Loss is one of them and has come in several forms.

We all suffer from loss through out our lives in different ways.  Loss of a home (or country).  Loss of identity (common for expats), loss of friendships and more.  But worst of all is the loss of a life. It's a painful lesson that everyone learns - no one is exempt no matter where you live or who you know.  

This year my boys have had to learn first hand what it means to lose people from your life (but not your hearts). We've been lucky thus far that beyond the loss of our dog Sailor 3 1/2 years ago, that they had not needed to learn what it means to have someone gone forever.  They lost 3 of their great-grandparents before Aidan was even 4 (Liam was 1) - an age where not only did they not understand the concept of death, but also could not comprehend the idea of forever and honestly have limited memories of them beyond pictures.  But the last 6 months alone have been filled with these losses and it breaks my heart watching them process what death means. 

Jake's (our beloved dog) death in August hit us all pretty hard.  Liam still talks about him at least once a week.  Aidan is one who keeps his feelings in check and is often very emotionally reserved.  On occasion he will tell us that he misses Jake.  The day Jake died, I could see the pain in Aidan's eyes - he was upset because when we left for vacation he had not said goodbye to Jake and now would not have that opportunity ever again.  Jake taught us what unconditional love means.  

Then in October my last grandparent passed away.  We weren't close.  Aidan hadn't seen him since he was 2 and Liam had never met him.  It did not impact them.  Nor did I expect it to.

A few weeks ago, a beloved teacher at the boys' school passed away.  She was in her mid 60s and taught nursery school.  Liam knew her as he started BFIS in nursery and while she wasn't his teacher, with only about 25 kids in all of nursery at that time, they often spent time together as a group for recess, lunch, etc. The campus was stunned by her passing.  Being an international school it's normal for not just the students to come and go but also for the staff.  But Ms. Peggy had been at the school for years and was a fixture there.  She knew everyone.  She always had a kind word and a smile.  She was full of energy. She was full of ... life.

I didn't know Ms. Peggy beyond the occasional wave and "how are you doing?" and yet when I heard of her passing, I was shocked and emotionally raw.  These things just don't happen at BFIS.  Right? Aidan didn't know her well either but when his soccer coach called for a moment of silence before their soccer game in her honor (her passing had not yet been announced to the kids unknown to him at that time), you could see the shock in his eyes.  And I heard him stage whisper "Ms. Peggy died??".  

He didn't cry.  He didn't believe it either.  He made me read the email that came from the school.  He was adamant that he had seen her that morning.  I assured him that he had not seen her that morning as she had passed that morning.  

Liam's reaction, that of a typical 6 year old.  "That's so sad.  But she was old.  Old people die."  Very to the point.  He didn't have that emotional attachment.  Nor did I expect him to.  He's only 6.

Neither of them wanted to attend the memorial service and I didn't want to push it.  It wasn't that they didn't care, it just didn't impact them in the way that it did for other people.  This has to be something that they are comfortable with.  If they weren't feeling the loss the same way as others, why make a sad situation worse by intensifying the emotions in a room full of mourning people? 

Again, that was just a few weeks ago.  This afternoon, right around noon, I received a call from the head of school.  He told me that something had happened at the school.  I immediately thought something happened to one of the boys.  Thankfully they were ok but what he told me caught me completely off guard.  He told me that Mr. Stone, Aidan's co-teacher, had passed away unexpectedly this morning.

It wasn't until after this news that I really gave some thought on just how much impact teachers have on our children.  Yes, they teach them; they guide them.  But beyond that.  They are with them more hours per day then they are with us.  When I think of how well my children know myself and Josh and vice versa and then I look at how few hours they spend with us compared to their teachers... well, do the math.  These teachers have a huge impact on our children above and beyond their education.  They help to shape the people they will some day become.  

Mr. Stone was new at BFIS this year.  I didn't know him well but he seemed like a very nice guy.  He was young, only 26.  I knew his parents had been out to visit him over the winter break from Ohio.  I knew he wasn't sure if he was going to stay beyond the one year as he missed his family.  But I also knew that this is a teacher that Aidan adores.  You see, not only was he the co-teacher in his class, but he was also Aidan's private tutor once a week.  

When I first suggested a tutor to Aidan he was absolutely against the idea.  But after his first session with Mr. Stone, he was a changed kid.  Suddenly homework was no longer painful in our house (ok, except for the occasional outburst).  He became more independent with his school work.  Aidan looked forward to these sessions with Mr. Stone every week.  There was a week when a soccer game was scheduled for the same day and he was so worried that he would miss his weekly session with Mr. Stone that he was willing to sacrifice his soccer game so that he could meet with him.  Mr. Stone had an impact on Aidan's life.  And when you meet someone who has an impact in your life, no matter how old you are - you remember that.  And when they leave your life - you won't forget that either.

This is Aidan's first true loss.  And he is devastated.  And he is so young that it breaks my heart.  I remember my first loss of a loved one.  I was probably about his age give or take a year.  It was my great uncle Wally.  I will never forget the feelings of sadness when my parents told me he had died. And it was at that age that I became aware of my own mortality, my parents mortality and the mortality of those all around me.  That's a pretty scary feeling for a kid.  Emotions that I'm sure are running thru Aidan's head right now.

I picked the boys up at school expecting Aidan to be highly emotional.  At the same time, I know him and he doesn't wear his emotions on his sleeve.  When I picked him up he just kind of shrugged his shoulders and was like, no big deal.  I knew that wasn't true and it pained me to see that he felt he had to hide his feelings.  He told me that they wrote letters and drew pictures in class and that his picture had the two of them together with the words "best friends forever".  Yeah, the tears were streaming down my own face at that one.  

The moment we got into the car, he broke down.  Tears welling up and crying his little heart out.  I never want to see my children in pain but in a way it warmed my heart to see that he could allow himself to be emotional since I know it's not something that comes easily to him.  Liam, being the compassionate brother he is, just reached out and said "I'm really sorry Aidan".  I don't think I could have asked for more in that situation.

We got home and we gave Aidan some space.  He was highly emotional and we could hear him crying but he didn't want to be with anyone.  I tried talking with him but he needed to be alone.  I had no choice but to respect that.  After Liam went to bed, I offered to let Aidan stay up with me for a bit to talk about it.  He didn't want to talk but just laid on my lap and cried.  He wouldn't let me rub his head or back... he just needed my presence to comfort him but I felt so helpless to guide him thru this moment.  

Tomorrow he goes back to school, or at least that is the plan for the moment.  I think he's going to get the best support there and being with his friends and other teachers will be good for him.  But if he's not up for it, then we will play it by ear.  I know that the school will have the best support available.  I also know that they will plan a memorial of some kind for Mr. Stone.  Aidan has already told me he would very much like to attend.  

I cannot imagine the grief that Mr. Stone's parents must be going thru right now.  Mr. Stone was a mere 26 years old.  I may never get the chance to meet them, but I hope I get the opportunity some day to let them know that their son, while taken too young from this world, had an impact on at least one student. One student who looked up to him.  One student who will remember him forever.  

The next several days are going to be tough.  The community will grieve.  Aidan will continue to grieve as well.  It will take some time for normalcy to resume.  But we will come together and get thru this together.  And we will learn from this untimely loss - we must live life every day to it's fullest because we never know when it might be our last.  And if I know Aidan, he will continue to work hard because he knows it would make Mr. Stone proud.  

Besos and our deepest sympathies to the Stone family,

Julie

Death Follows Us (on vacation)

That's a strange title, I know, but seems true nonetheless. And I don't mean to make light of a sad situation, just find it interesting... We arrived in Barcelona in January, 2010 with 2 kids and 2 dogs. In July 2010, we were on vacation in Costa Brava when we received a call that Sailor was very ill. The day of our return we had to say goodbye to our sweet little Sailor Moon. A few months later as we were searching for our rental home in Arles, France, we received a call that our dear friend Shane had died of a heart attack. He was 35 - too young. The next few years seemed to be death free, but in August this year, the day we arrived in Croatia, we received a call that Jake's health had declined significantly. The next day we had to have him put to sleep. So it should come as no surprise that Josh and I arrived in Florence, Italy on Friday and on Saturday morning I woke up to an email from my mom that my last grandparent had passed away.

I'm not looking for sympathy emails or posts related to this entry. I hadn't actually spoken to my grandfather in over 7 years for reasons still officially unknown to me though supposedly were related to the fact that we did not do a bris for Aidan and we're not raising him Jewish. He never even acknowledged Liam's birth nor did he ever meet him.  However, despite my rocky relationship with him over the last 7 years, I'm thinking back to words my mom recently said to me about another subject and trying to remember the good long history rather than focusing on the recent stuff that caused our estrangement.

My Zaide (as I called him) and I were close for almost 30 years.  We were especially close the year that my Nana passed away when I was 21.  I spoke to him almost daily back then.  I remember how much he was struggling to get thru each day without her.  And then he met his second wife and suddenly our relationship changed.

But I remember back to my childhood and all the happy memories.  Playing checkers.  We would always play checkers whenever I would visit.  And we would go to the basement where he had a treasure trove of history - some would perhaps call this hoarding (looking back that's totally what it was) but I loved every inch of the basement and all the knick knacks, books and family history that were contained in its walls.

Speaking of history, he helped to cultivate my interest in our family's past.  He was second generation in the US and his family had come from Eastern Europe - Russia and Poland.  Many had been lost in WWII and yet he pressed on to find ways to find just another branch on our family tree.  He was always excited to show me the latest on what he had found on our family tree.

Every year my birthday would fall during Boston's Scooper Ball, an ice cream festival that at the time was held near Frog Pond, not far from where Zaide would work.  I would go into Boston, a big deal for me as at the time I maybe went into the city once or twice per year, to meet him and he would take me to the Scooper Ball.  It was time where it was just us and I looked forward to that every single year. It was our tradition.

Even as an adult I would reach out to him at least once a week if not more often, just to catch up.  I remember going to his house to tell him I was pregnant with Aidan.  And the look of excitement knowing he was going to be a great grandfather.  He was soooo happy!!  And I remember him coming to see us at the hospital after he was born, a big trek for him as he was already 80.

There's so much more that I remember but I could go on forever - and quite honestly the last 7 years have put a bad taste in my mouth that I'd rather just leave it at these memories.  After Aidan, I just don't know what happened, before I became pregnant with Liam he just stopped returning my phone calls.  I have my theories but now I will never know.  We hadn't spoken a word in over 7 years and while I certainly made efforts with letters and an annual holiday card, I never received a word back.  He never met or acknowledged Liam in any way and had not seen Aidan since he was about 2.  So for the last 7 years I've been harboring anger and resentment because of the hurt he has put me and my family thru (as I'm not the only one he wasn't speaking with).  But like I said before, I'm trying to put the bad years behind me and focus on the positive impact he had on my life.

So I say goodbye to one more during our time in Europe.  I can only hope that this a trend that does not stick around!!

Besos,
Julie

Capt'n Jake (November 17, 2000 - August 23, 2013)

I’m way behind on my posts.  I still have about a half dozen from our time in the US and right now we are in Croatia but this post takes priority over all others.  We seem to have some bad luck when it comes to summer vacations and our beloved pets.  Three years ago when we were on vacation in the Costa Brava, our Sailor became incredibly sick and upon our return, we had to make the decision to put her down at only 8 ½ years old. 

This vacation unfortunately seems no different.  Jake has been ill for a number of months now with struggles with his breathing.  He took a turn for the worse around April and since then, we’ve known his time with us was limited and that likely he would not see his 13^th birthday in November.  I had a dream the night before we left for Croatia that he died when we left – who knew that that would be a premonition of what was to come. 

Within 2 hours of landing in Split, Croatia on Thursday morning, as we made the 3 ½ hour trek down to Dubrovnik via car, we had a call from our dog sitter, Linda.  She was concerned about Jake’s breathing and he had vomited a number of times.  We weren’t sure what to make of it.  Was she blowing things out of proportion or was it worse than the times he had done this for us?  And yes, this is what we had progressed to with him.  We knew he wasn’t healthy but we assumed much of this was related to old age and our vet had not indicated otherwise.  He never seemed to be in pain and he never had the "look" in his eyes that others had told us about where we would just know that his time had come - so we had just continued on, knowing the inevitable was not so far away, appreciating just each day that we got with him.

Linda pressed us to have him brought to the vet and we eventually agreed knowing the moment was likely upon us.  We were hesitant at first only because we figured that the breathing issues and vomiting he had already been doing was no different than what he did with us and that the vet wasn’t going to be able to fix it.  It turns out that his condition was worse than we realized and it’s not for lack of good veterinary care because we have a great vet – it’s just that the medical care is different here than in the States and in order to avoid invasive procedures we just took our vet’s word that the problem was his trachea. 

What we weren’t aware of is that the flap of skin covering his trachea was no longer opening and that he was unable to breathe properly.  This flap of skin closes to prevent food from going down your trachea – however, when not eating, this flap needs to open to allow air to enter the trachea and into your lungs.  He had been struggling to breathe before and we’d had an ultra sound done on his heart and his lungs and eventually the diagnosis was related to his thyroid (which was already an issue for him) and that because his thyroid was malfunctioning, he was then having issues with his breathing.  We’d been working on regulating his meds to find a happy balance for him.   

Linda brought him to the vet (not ours as he is away on vacation) and he was immediately given a sedative and an oxygen mask.  His being alone without his family was torture to me and the thought will haunt me for a long time.  He stayed overnight and I received a call from Linda Friday morning that Jake did not have a good night and that things seemed to be progressing quickly and that we could not wait until we are back in Barcelona in 9 days – we had 3 options – 1. Surgery that he would likely not live thru or could have potentially fatal side effects, 2.  Return to Barcelona immediately to put him down or 3.  Stay put and have the vet put him down.

None of these options are / were appealing in any way.  We found a compromise that still doesn’t truly work for us but hopefully would help us make peace with our decision.  We decided to skype with Jake (what would we do without technology?) – we knew he wouldn't get it but hopefully just hearing our voices and if he can, see our faces, would help him to know that we were there with him, even if we weren't physically there and that we love him so very much. 

For the kids, it would hopefully give them closure to see him alive one last time.  Aidan was distraught because in our rush to leave at 4:45AM Thursday morning, he did not kiss Jake or say goodbye to him.  He was very emotional knowing that he had not said goodbye and that he missed what would be his last opportunity to do so. 

Unfortunately neither of us had a good enough internet connection to make the skype work.  But we had reached the point of no return and at this point we had to do what was right for him, not about us.  Linda said he did not look good and his breathing was very labored and that it might not be good for the kids to see him that way.  As it was, hearing Aidan's voice crack as he said good-bye and I love you to Jake was enough to break my heart in a million pieces.  We just couldn't stop crying as we said good bye to our sweet sweet boy.  

It pains me to know that I couldn’t hold him like I did with Sailor as he passed away.  But knowing that he is no longer suffering or in any pain will have to make up for that.  We couldn’t possibly make him hold off until we got back – it would have been selfish to do so and would have only tortured him. 

We have been so fortunate to have a dog like Jake.  He was our first “baby” and until our actual babies came along, he lived the high life.  Though I can’t say he lived a bad life even after the babies came along, just perhaps a more mellow life though - but not to shabby seeing he made a transcontinental move and went on a few trips to France.  I don't know many dogs that have done that. 

Aidan, Liam and Jake in Arles, France - Oct 2010

He loved the beach and loved swimming. He would swim in the Atlantic in the middle of February if you let him.  Back in November, when we got a car, the first thing we did was take him to the beach since he had not been in 3 years.  While he couldn’t swim like he used to, you could see the happiness on his face. 

Aidan and Jake in November 2012 at the beach

Jake and Sailor at the Knob in Falmouth - before kids

Jake the reindeer in Barcelona 2012

Aidan, Liam and Jake - 2008

Liam and Jake - 2009

Josh, Aidan and Jake - 2004

Liam and Jake on the Cape - 2008

Jake and Sailor - I think this was 2002

My favorite picture of my boy - also in 2002 I believe... so handsome :)

Aidan and Jake - 2004

Aidan, Josh and Jake - 2004

He was the most patient, loving and kind dog you could ask for.  Back before we had kids, the neighbor kids used to come over to ask if Jake could come out to play.  He was so gentle with them.  He never would nip or jump on kids, it was like he understood they were too little.  I wish I had some pictures of him back then but they were all pre digital camera and are in storage right now.  

Whenever someone would arrive at the house, no matter what country we were in, he would always rush to find a toy to bring to show them, as if to welcome them into our home with something of his. 

He loved to snuggle and though he seemed to want to have his own space in the last year with little desire to be on our bed (which in all fairness is a lot smaller than what we had at home, thereby making it so much hotter as well), he always loved to lay right on top of your legs, despite being a hefty 80 lbs.  He needed to touch you, to be right up close.  I will miss those snuggles every day.

And while he didn’t snuggle us a lot these days, Liam was constantly snuggling him.  The entire time we were in the US, Liam kept telling me how much he missed his Jakie.  And we all did.  When we would call Josh, we’d have him put the phone up to Jake’s ear so we could say hi to him.  And while he was close with both boys, he was especially close to Liam who has a way with dogs that is just so peaceful and calming to them.  He would lay with him constantly just rubbing him.

Aidan is differently emotional than Liam.  He tends to hold things in internally.  He has been taking Jake’s health very seriously and of course, at 9, has a much better understanding of what is happening than Liam. 

Josh and I, of course, are distraught.  It was a horrible day when we had to put Sailor down 3 years ago.  And having to do it again was not something either of us were looking forward to.  But she was a different dog than Jake – she didn’t bond with us in the same way - she was more of a dog's dog than a people's dog and that bond is what makes this day with Jake that much more difficult.  Because to us, he was practically human – I know that sounds weird and strange, but I feel that he understood us in a way that another dog would not, and there were days I swear he understood English. 

As Liam says a lot lately, I wish Jake could be a puppy again so we could have more time with him.  12 ½ years was not enough with this amazing dog.  But we are lucky to have had that time being his family.  We love you Jake and will miss you now and forever.

Jake and Liam - 2013

Jake and Liam - 2011

Jake and Liam - 2011

Jake and Liam - 2008

At his favorite place - Mashnee Island beach ... 

Besos,

Julie